“Aging in place” is the mantra of elder care

“Aging in place” is the mantra of elder care, ideally at home or in one facility that will serve your needs forever. It rarely happens. Things change. In the trade, moves are known to cause “relocation trauma,” physically and emotionally, for the frail elderly person, already sick and scared, and for the adult children, who must orchestrate everything. -From The New York Times blog, “The New Old Age”

As part of the community “TimesPeople” I regularly comment on the The New Old Age Blog. Here is what I have to say about their recent article, The Last Place She Expected to Be

These are very significant life-style changes, as they signal a loss of independence. It represents a time when our loved ones lose control over their environment and their health. Restrictive environments like assisted living and nursing homes are increasingly pushing adult children and seniors' specialists to redefine how we look at aging. It can be argued they serve a purpose, but the sentiment of a strong majority of seniors and their adult children (over 85%) is these restrictive envirionments are a destination of last resort on the "way out."

Ten thousand Boomers a day are turning 65. Boomers must not only contend with lifestyle and wellness issues of their own but additionally must focus on the well-being of their aging parents, whose age group at 86 is the fastest growing segment of the senior population. Add to the mix angst over money and you could end up with a recipe for disaster. Showing empathy toward your fellow Boomer by way of your comments carries cathartic and therapeutic benefits. But that's not enough. Life should be about fulfillment, and that happens when you're better prepared. So stay engaged and healthy for a lifetime of independence.

Andy Berger

Andy Berger is the president of Senior Wellness Specialists, a lifestyle and healthcare services company offering Universal Design and Senior Concierge services for all stages of life. 

Caring for Our Aging Parents and Ourselves

A recent article in the New York Times blog talks about long-distance, low-maintenance arrangements between children and aging parents. It is quite common for someone to live in New York, for example, and worry about their parents who are retired and living in Florida. Here is a link to the article and my comments below.

Time for a reality check: The sheer numbers are enough to make all of us anxious--tens of millions, and growing, aging parents and aging Boomers are putting tremendous strain on families and society, and we have only just begun to try to cope with this Tsunami of sorts. And don't look for government to step in with any meaningful solutions--family and friends will, like it or not, be called on to step up and shoulder most of the responsibility.

Starting now and for the next 20 years or so all of us will be put to the test, as your comments have revealed. Do you have what it takes to be an effective caregiver? You'll soul-search about how much or how little you care for your parents. How's your judgment? Will it be clouded by irrational/emotional decisions? Do you have the time, the money and support of family and friends? Do you have the good sense to consult an attorney or expert on aging to prevent panic and chaos? Unfortunately, many problems arise over money and in-fighting among siblings. Issues tend to be about feeling burdened or taken advantage of when it comes to caring for parents. Families squabble over inheritance; how much money mom or dad will go through before they die.

The time to be proactive is now. The aging train will be making many stops. Be prepared. Especially in these tumultuous times, we must keep our sanity.

Don't know where to start? Contact us for a free, no obligation consultation to see if we can help improve the quality of life for your parents and make you rest easier.